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Two concerts

Revision 1:The pianist, entranced by his own sound,is dancing on his bench. Hes much too bold:The oboe cant be heard as it deserves.They play beside each other to compounda classic hymn to music theyd...

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Re: Two concerts

Hi, Don.Interesting rhyme scheme, not often employed:ABBACCDDEEFFGG, is that right? Any name for this pattern?A couple of points:"oboe's featured song"--I just have to query "song" in this context....

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Re: Two concerts

Would a piano really drown out the very cutting, distinctive tones of the oboe?Gotta go to bed, but just want to say: yes, it did.I'll get back on the other stuff. Thanks.

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Re: Two concerts

A delight to read aloud.These lines stand out for me:The Taiko drum their dances, dance their drums.They work to draw the crowd into their thrumsThis one:and beats, their leaps and cries and spins.is...

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Re: Two concerts

First revision done.I got more deliberate about the rhymes from a whole-poem point of view - before I had a good scheme for each of the three parts separately but not for the whole thing. As a result...

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